Are your relationships and friendships saint-making or soul-shaking?
In this episode of “The Catholic Gentleman,” John Heinen, Sam Guzman and Devin Schadt discuss how to discern whether others are guiding us toward sanctity, or steering us into spiritual turmoil!
Devin begins by explaining how “at the fall of Man…we broke our relationships with other people.” Because of this, he says “understanding other people and people understanding us is a constant point of division” for humanity.
Now in today’s digital age, the true meaning of friendship seems distorted and mired in a maze of likes and shares far removed from genuine human connection. “Are you a great friend because you have 5,000 followers on Facebook?” he asks.
The gentlemen instead say we should instead measure our relationships with others by whether or not they are helping you both become closer to God.
If you’re dealing with a toxic relationship that isn’t, John explains that the “Three B’s”—Breaks, Boundaries, and Barriers—are great ways to discern how to address the problem. “Relationships need pauses to maintain our identity and to truly love the other person.”
Sam says the importance of establishing boundaries to protect oneself from harm and manipulation is actually a lesson drawn straight from the Gospel’s call to love thyself as a precursor to loving others. “Boundaries are saying I am a free human being. I am not going to let you treat me this way.”
When relationships veer into harmful territory, he suggests the establishment of barriers can protect well-being. “Christ never calls us to allow ourselves to be actively abused by other people. That’s not what sacrificial love is about.”
This episode has great advice for confronting these hard truths about toxic relationships with prayer, fasting, and a commitment to personal growth to overcome them!
Watch below 👇
🙏 Lord, help us love our neighbors as ourselves!
